“If you’re going through hell, keep going.” — Winston Churchill
By Dawn Onley
Gayle King, Oprah’s sidekick bestie, said something on her news show once that has stuck with me. She said it’s important to keep everything in perspective; that the hard times and challenges we experience in life won’t last always.
During these times, Gayle said she asks herself whether whatever she’s going through will matter a year from now. Of course a loved one’s death or learning you have a terminal illness will still matter. That’s not what she was referring to, although with time, even a tragedy loses some of its sting. She was talking about the vast majority of things many people stress about on a daily basis: what a co-worker said that left you miffed, intentional (or unintentional) slights, family squabbles, break-ups, misunderstandings, disagreements, even more challenging scenarios that can find us grappling with crime or a loved one who has made bad choices.
Although each of these things has the ability to unnerve us, the truth is most of the things that trouble us won’t matter much a year from now. In the grand scheme of things.
We all know this, yet still hearing it was life altering for me. Worriers know that worrying solves nothing and that things have a way of working out the way they are supposed to. Yet still we worry.
Stop right where you are. Think about what is bothering you, if anything, at this moment. Realize that this too shall pass.
This doesn’t mean that all of our days will be happy ones or that we won’t experience trials. I have experienced the throes of pain and heartache. I have had days where I didn’t want to get out of the bed, let alone talk to anyone. I’ve been in deep funks, despondent and sad, anxious and worried. For myself. For people who I love.
Ultimately, I stopped worrying and started trusting the process. I started allowing myself to feel the pain, to react to it and to work through it.
I believe that things work out. If not for good, things work out in ways that we can learn to deal with – ways that won’t break us. Eventually.
Hang in there.