‘I Think Her Whole Life was a Celebration of Life’



By Dawn Onley

Verlia Carter was not diminished in her darkest hour. She illuminated.

In late October, Ms. Verlia enlisted the help of her children and threw herself a belated birthday bash for the ages. In a packed room inside one of the poshest restaurants in town, her family, former co-workers, classmates, church and childhood friends came out to celebrate her turning 74 a month prior. They came out in droves to show Ms. Verlia how much they admired her courageous fight to battle death while still choosing to live.

And how she never lost her joy. And how she never stopped dancing. On that day, donning a floor length white dress, Ms. Verlia performed a liturgical dance to Walter Hawkins’ song “Marvelous” and wooed the crowd, looking like an angel.

You gave that I might live.

You gave that I might be set free.

Exchanged your life for mine,

What a marvelous thing you’ve done.

People stood to give heartfelt tributes to her life. A constant theme was how selfless she was, how much of an inspiration, how she mothered an entire community’s children, how she exhibited great faith, how unique and beautiful and adored and generous she was. How she was always the sharpest dressed. How she radiated light and strength and hope. How her smile could brighten any room.

The attendees gave Ms. Verlia her flowers while she could still enjoy them. They gave her a portion of all that she had given to them.

“I think her whole life was a celebration of life,” said my Aunt Karen Hall, who attended Asbury United Methodist Church with Ms. Verlia and who would call and check on her, particularly as her health declined. “When Verlia would talk to me about her cancer, she would say maybe three or four sentences about how she was feeling, but it was always with the attitude that it is what it is. She wasn’t in denial about it at all. She just wasn’t into complaining or talking about it at length.”


While many people would have withdrawn into themselves and detached from others facing a similar fate — and they would be perfectly justified in doing so, I might add — Ms. Verlia used her time and energy to help others, through song, by mentoring and supporting the children, by running her church’s youth choir, through her dance ministry. Even as her physical body grew weaker, she extended herself until the very end, which sadly came this past Sunday.

Tomorrow, Ms. Verlia’s funeral will be held in the ornate Weinberg Theater for the Arts in the heart of town – an unusual site for such an affair, but a fitting one. Ms. Verlia has sung here before with a gospel group called The Guiding Lights. “We felt it was a perfect place for her final celebration,” said her daughter, Rochelle Greene.

Ms. Verlia was sweet and kind and had an insatiable love of life. No cancer could ever take that away. Even when it ravaged her body, cancer could not kill her spirit.

Her joy was infectious. She passed her legacy of hope down to her children.

“She was an inspiration. She was a role model. She always had an encouraging word. No matter how sick she was, she gave you encouragement,” Aunt Karen said.

This is how I want to be remembered. This is how we all should want to be remembered.



12 Comments Add yours

  1. Cassandra Rollins says:

    I’m reminded of the song “LET MY LIFE SPEAK FOR ME”….surely she was a beacon of light and hope to all that came in contact with her! Such a lovely tribute to a Queen! Rest in Heaven Ms. Verlia! To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for reading and commenting. From everything I’ve heard and read about Ms. Verlia, her beautiful exterior, although significant, was nothing compared to the beauty of what was inside. She was an inspiration. May she rest on with the Lord.


  2. Karen L. Hall says:

    What a beautifully written tribute to a beautiful person. Verlia’s life touched so many people. May God bless her family. She will be missed.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Aunt Karen, and thanks for painting the picture of who she was. Such a special, unique, loving person who walked the talk. Her kids will rise up and call her BLESSED! Love ya.


  3. Pamela Griffin says:

    I was Reminded when I first meet you That Smile and warm welcomed I felt…..Continue to Rest in that Sweet home in Heaven ….To the Family Continue to hold on to Gods Unchanging Hands Thank The Lord To be Absent from the body Is To be Present Wit the Lord Prayers of Comfort & Strength for you All God Bless!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, you could tell by her smile that she was a warm, genuine and loving person. May she rest peacefully with the Lord.


  4. Melissa Love says:

    Rest in Paradise Ms Verla… I will always remember you singing “Falling in Love with Jesus”, your grace, and strength.

    To the family- my deepest sympathy-
    Melissa Love (formerly Jones) and family

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Evelyn king says:

    Rest in peace ms. Verlander you will be missed . Prayers for the family.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Calvin says:

    Awesome read

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Judy says:

    An angel on earth who now has a star of her own in heaven. Selfless and loving. And so loved for her goodness her kindness her wisdom. And so missed by us all.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Nannie Brooks says:


    Liked by 1 person

  9. Kaye Coates says:

    Fondly remembering my friend Verlia today on the anniversary of the day she took flight to glory. She was larger than life and beautiful inside and out. I miss her still.


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